Children often find it hard to express emotions. As children grow, along with their circumstances and surroundings they also learn to adapt to situations. But in this process of growth, they may have difficulty in understanding what they are going through. They may not know the right words to use to explain what emotions they are experiencing at that present time.
Often children who are not allowed to express emotions while growing up will end up with emotions that have not been worked on at all. It grows in their heart and then as adults, it becomes really hard for them to express it. It would take a skilled therapist to tap into those emotions and help them address each of those feelings and emotions.
There are some factors to consider when talking about children and emotions:
1. Environment: Consider the environment that they are brought up in. If the home that they grew up in had a father who grew up in a very strict home and was not allowed to cry or show emotions, then that would be the same treatment he would extend to his son. That is the only behaviour and manner of coping that the father has learnt or known.
Likewise, if there is no history of addressing emotions then the child doesn’t possess the ability or skills to understand what he or she is going through nor does she have the ability to express it.
2. Personality: If the child is soft spoken and quiet then too the child will find it difficult to express openly what they are going through. The child might be withdrawn because she may not know the words to communicate so these issues have to be handled very carefully.
3. Neglect of parents: If parents are too busy and don’t have time for the child, this too can severely hamper the child and the way they express their emotions.
They grow up not being able to share with anyone their frustrations and their thoughts.
This will make them either very sensitive and emotional or it will make them hard – hearted and not being able to engage emotionally.
4. Bullying: If a child is exposed to bullying, it also has an adverse effect on the emotions of the child. The child may not be able to understand how to express their fears. There might be some fears that might be there in the mind of the child is stopping the child from speaking out what they are going through.
Some ways that a child can be helped:
Allowing the child to express their emotions with the use of different forms of play is a healthy approach to consider. Spending time playing with the children will allow them to cultivate a sense of trust between them.
Understanding how children feel and think is important to helping create a healthy environment for them to come and share what they are going through and thinking. Once that knowledge is there, it will help parents to give their child space and freedom to express themselves.
Bringing parents to speed on the effects of neglect is a very important point to consider. Giving options of how the family can make time for the child would be the need of the hour. Understanding that this has tremendous impact on the development of the child is imperative.
If there is any bullying happening and the family knows about this, it is important for the family to work with the child and a therapist, so that the child will be helped to come out of the fear and to also find ways to combat the fear.
Read more articles on: Why Emotions Matter Part 1 , Part 2, Part 3
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